Would you like to play a game?

First, I don’t want to be publicly outer/exposed. No doxxing me. OK?

Here’s the game. See if you can figure out who I really am. This isn’t a “guessing game.” You can’t just randomly guess; you need to see if you can use your sleuthing, blood-hound skills to determine of there are internet crumbs that lead you to discover my identity. 

If you’ve found a path to discovering who I am, email me at ChristyBA75@gmail.com and tell me (1) who I am, and (2) how you discovered it.

A couple of years ago there was a glitch in an app that linked two accounts that I had: one with my name as Christy and one with my real name. Someone figured it out and emailed me. Thankfully he didn’t publicly out me. (Thanks again if you’re reading this.) He knows my real name. He’s assured me that he hasn’t and won’t disclose it publicly, and I appreciate that. Within an hour of him notifying me, I deleted the accounts from that app and deleted the app, but I'm curious if there are other clues out there.

Under my real name, I MAY start coming out of the closet, but I doubt that I’ll ever associate my real name with my pseudonym. What you may discover over the next few years is that I post here a bit less and that “someone else” starts posting things elsewhere on the internet about their sexual adventures. Also, I’m getting busier with other things, so I’ll be turning over much of the story-telling to my husband, "Joe". He is just as verbose as me and is even more techie.

So, if you’re up for a sleuthing challenge, come find me!  (Just please don’t post how you found me. If you find a good bread-crumb trail, you won’t need me to confirm the truth. You’ll know it. But if you do find an accurate path and you know the truth and email me the info, I will confirm it for you as long as you can make me feel assured that you’ll keep the info private.)

Coming Out to You All?

We’re getting close to coming out of the closet and into the open. As the years go on and as our kids grow and as our church status changes, we have less to lose. Be coming out, we can be more genuine and say what’s on our minds in real life, not just on the internet.

Of course, there are still fears. The biggest one is that something bad may happen as a result of us coming out that we didn’t anticipate: one of us gets fired from our job because our boss learns the truth (very unlikely that he’d care), or that we’ll lose more friends than we thought, or that we lose the mystique of being anonymous, or that our kids resent us (though we're pretty sure they already know what's up with us).

What do you think? Should we come out and say who we are? Why or why not? We'd really like to hear your thoughts.

Party at home - And Bambi

Joe here. 

Every word of this is true, other than the names. 

We had a party here last night with about 40 people. We had met about 16 of them before. The rest were new to us, but we’d seen photos of them (or at least much of their bodies) online. They all knew what kind of party this was, so they came with the same general intentions. Most people don’t look as good as their online pictures, but some look better. Bambi was one of those. We found Mark and Bambi on Feeld, a swinger app. We’d been chatting with them for almost a year and never seemed to be able to meet up with them. I got the feeling that we were more interested in them than they were in us. A few weeks ago, they RSVPd to our party, and then a few days ago they warned us that they probably weren’t going to make it. No surprise. Oh well. Then just a few hours before the party he texted to tell us that they would come. The guests arrived at the appointed hour.  When Mark and Bambi arrived, wow! He was suave and she was tall drop-dead gorgeous. She looked like 35 year-old Maggie Gyllenhaal, but absolutely stunningly gorgeous. She looked like she’s have a French accent, and I was surprised that she didn’t, yet she was eloquent and brought the room to silence upon their entrance. She acted as if she didn’t know how good looking she was. 

After welcoming all the guests and everyone introduced themselves, the event got started. It wasn’t more than two minutes before Bambi approached me and asked if she could kiss me. I was stunned, but quickly said, “Of course” and we stood there making out for a minute. She thanked me and moved on. 15 minutes later, her dress was off and she was walking around in black high heels and a tight black lace swimsuit-like outfit. It was VERY see-through and laced down the front. She approached me again and asked if I’d like to lick her nipples. Of course I said yes, then she asked if she could give me a blow job. She took my hand and walked me to a couch. I admitted to her that I wasn’t quite “ready”. She offered to wait and come back to me, but I didn’t want to miss my chance with her. I sat down on the couch and before I could get my pants down to my knees, I was good and ready. Oh she was good at it. She knew all the classic BJ moves. She didn’t miss a thing. It was only about two minutes, but it was awesome! She then moved on to elsewhere in the party.

By this time, most everyone at the party was either naked or just down to their undies. My wife was in an adjacent room getting fucked. I walked in and she was climbing on her second guy and having a great time. So I went back to see what Bambi was doing. I saw her and another attractive woman, Rebecca , kneeling side-by-side giving Steve a blow job. Steve’s wife, Amy, was behind Bambi rubbing up on Bambi and Rebecca. I sat in a chair close by watching and hoping that if Bambi looked around for something to do next that she’s pick me again. But I didn’t want to appear to eager. I didn’t want her to be creeped out by me being a stalker, so I just sat back. Bambi, Rebecca and Amy were all kneeling on the floor naked and were making out and fingering one another. It was so tempting to want to reach in. Some women are open to having someone just join in, some women aren’t. I, and most men, are’t good at reading signs, so it’s best for us to wait for an explicit invitation. 

Bambi laid back on the floor with her head right next to my chair. Amy was going down on her licking Bambi’s pussy. Bambi was moaning with delight. When he eyes opened, she saw me and reached up to me. Her hand went to my knee and then to my crotch. I took that as an invitation to kneel down and kiss her. I then sucked on her tits and she pulled down my boxers and gave me a blow job while Amy licked her clit. Bambi then whispered, “fuck me”.

Oh yes!

Bambi told Amy, “He’s going to fuck me”. That was Bambi’s nice way of telling Amy that she needed to move aside. I grabbed a condom and put it on so fast, and thrust inside her. Oh yes! I kissed her and told her that she was beautiful and gorgeous. I said her name out loud. (I read somewhere that women like that. I hope it’s generally true.) I’m 99% confident that she was having orgasms. I could have taken my time to tease and play with her and build up over the next few minutes to hours, but I didn’t know if I’d get another chance with her. And I knew that I wasn’t saving myself for anyone else that evening, so I let it all go. I came hard, and I pounded in her. And she came hard. It was AMAZING! 

Once we both started coming down, I backed out and smiled at her and thanked her by name. I said, “I hope I didn’t give you too bad a rug burn.” She said, “Not too bad.” I helped her up, then grabbed a tissue to remove the condom and deposit it into a trash can. I put my shorts back on and got something to rehydrate me. A perm-grin was on my face for a long time after that. 

I didn’t hover over her for the rest of the evening, but I did pass her frequently and smiled at her. I talked with her husband a couple of times for a while about our professional lives, and I conversed with her about her life. From what I noticed, she only had sex with me and her husband that night. If she did have sex with someone else, I’m sure it wasn’t with anyone before me.

After the party, I texted Mark and thanked them for coming and told them that we wanted to meet up with them again. He said that they’d like that also. I need to be careful that I don’t get stalker-is. I fear that I have a tendency to do that. But I also want them to know that we’re really into them. 

—

Oh, also at the end of the party, I also had sex with Brandy. (See previous entries if you don’t know who Brandy is.) And if you think that the names Brandy and Bambi are too similar or too stripper-like, just know that we pick pseudonyms that are related to their real names—makes it easier for us to keep track.

I just realized that I didn’t mention that I drove to Brandy’s place two weeks ago, had dinner with her and her husband and their kids (weird). Then Brandy and I went to a hotel room (with our spouses’ knowledge and consent) and Brandy and I had sex for a few hours. I came twice. Then I drove her back home. The sex was good. Brandy things we have great chemistry. I’m not so sure. She’s really into me. My wife is jealous about the whole thing and doesn’t really like it, but doesn’t know why. Brandy tells me that I’m very attractive. I don’t see it, and it almost makes me uncomfortable. She stares at me very seductively (or maybe a bit stalker-ish.) 

—

Tonight I told my wife that I had sex with Brandy at the end of the party. She didn’t know that. That made my wife jealous. She doesn’t know why. She says that I didn’t do anything wrong. Brandy wasn’t off limits at the party. My wife said that she should have been jealous of me having sex with Bambi since Bambi is movie-star gorgeous, but my wife wasn’t jealous of that. Christy couldn’t explain the reasons for the disparity in the jealousy, and I’ve learned to not push her to find reasons for her feelings. 

Time for bed.

Truth

This is Joe.

I’m being a bit raw and open here. Meaning that I’m admitting things that I don’t think are flattering of me. As I age, I’m trying/wanting to be more genuine. As the facade of the old LDS me drops away, I’m trying to discover who I really am and who I want to be as a person. I rarely like the real me that it’s in the mirror. My wife tells me that she wants the truth, but I don’t know if I want the truth.

The truth is that she fulfills the majority of my desires from any one person, but she doesn’t fulfill all. No one person possible could. However she was raised to (falsely) believe that a wife should be EVERYTHING to her husband and that he should want for nothing from anyone else. She now rationally knows that this is not possible and is a burden that she should have never believed in, but she’s having a hard time breaking herself of that notion, and when she falls back into old ways of thinking she resumes feeling like a failure if I want to have sex with other women. And I do want to have sex with other women. In the last few months, she’s let me have sex with three different women without her being present. And we’re all doing great! (One was with the woman’s husband present.) Christy has told me that I can go have sex with that woman again. That woman invited me to have sex with her next week without her husband present. I checked with her husband and he’s great with it. 

The other challenge is that Christy has a minor disability that occasionally keeps her from being as physically active as she wants to be. It can interfere at unpredictable times. In the past, I felt like she was sometimes using it as an excuse to avoid uncomfortable situations, and I feel bad for thinking that. (I can’t think of any examples of that happening so it’s probably not true, just my perception.) We were supposed to do something sexy last weekend, but her health got in the way. My challenge has been/is that I not be a mopey sack when that happens. I need to believe that she’s really trying to do her best and that she’s not using it as an excuse. When I mope, she then quietly gets mad and is less willing to accommodate me. We then get into a viscous cycle of digging in. I need to assume she’s doing her best, and I need to accept what she does.

Best Party Ever!! (Ever)

Joe here.

It’s so temping to come out of the closet . . . but not yet. 

What an amazing party last night! 50 people in an amazing hotel suite! Everyone was having a great time. Love and life was flowing. Everyone was kind and generous and fucking (amazing)! Christy had sex with three different guys plus me, plus a guy who tried but could get hard again fast enough after finishing with someone else. All the guys wanted to fuck Christy. She was the life of the party! (That’s my observation.) So many nice hot people. One couple brought two vanilla couples who just watched and who tried not to be scared. Everyone was nice to them. Christy helped a newbie couple come out of their shell and had some play time with them in a threesome to let them experience some things they’d never done before. It was almost like watching a therapy session for a couple who was already doing great! I had sex with two women in addition to Christy, and I got tons of blow jobs and made out with a lot of women and sucked a bunch of tits and got mine licked too. It was an incredible evening!

The best were the complements from the attendees! They were so complementary to us! There were a couple of “celebrity” swinger couples there who had been on Playboy TV—one of whom are considered to be the king and queen (in our opinion) of swingers—totally hot and awesome couple! They said and wrote some of the nicest things to us about the experience. It put us on top of the world 

This is a hodgepodge of thought during a visit by Brittany to our home. Written all by Joe.

----

I need to write a bit about what love is, and I need to do it while I’m thinking like this.

Christy is letting me have sex with another woman staying in our home. This woman is really into sex and and is attracted to me. She likes having sex. She is a nice, caring person. She is reasonable attractive. She has many good qualities. I am attracted to her.

But what I feel for Christy is 10,000x more. Christy is so much more to me. And I feel that. I really feel that. If I were to list all the reasons why I love Christy, I could list tons, but it still wouldn’t explain on paper what she is to me. I actually feel something very powerful toward her. I wish I could be analytical and explain what that is, but I can’t. I could try, and I’d be able to explain part of it. I could explain all the ties we have to each other, but that wouldn’t suffice. The feeling is powerful and I wish I could elucidate on it; however it’s a feeling, and I’m not good at describing feelings. That’s why I need to write this now. I want to write this in the moments that I’m feeling it so strong. I want to remember what this is like. I want to never forget this feeling. Christy is everything to me. She is perfect even when she’s not. Even in saying that, it’s descriptive and fails to explain that I mean. I just need to say that this is what love is. What I feel now is true love.

—

My wife and I have been swingers for the last five years. Mostly it's same-room full swap. Occasionally we've each been on a couple of solo dates. I have zero jealousy. She has some jealousy. She knows that it's not rational jealousy, and we both know (more or less) what triggers her jealousy.

I know (for the most part) what upsets her. For example, I need to not go have sex with a woman without clearing it with her first. She doesn't want me to get heavily emotionally involved with another woman via text/chat. Yesterday I said, "I appreciate that you've allowed me the privacy of not looking at my phone." She said, "Is there something on there I should see?" I said, "no." She said, "Good, because I really don't want to know." -- I do fear that if she read my phone, she might think that I've crossed her line a few times by getting too close to other women. But in general, my wife takes the approach of saying, "Don't cross the line, but if you do, I don't want to know. You haven't crossed the line have you? No? Good, but I don't want to know if you have, but I hope you haven't."

Personally I don't think it's a good idea for someone to willfully choose to be ignorant, but that's what's she wants to be. To some degree, I understand because she does have momentary flights of jealousy, so she doesn't see a reason to open herself to be triggered. Also, the "lines" aren't very well defined in some cases. Getting "too close" emotionally may mean something different to her than to me. What I may think is ok may set her off, so we agree to keep her out of the loop on some things.

The problem I'm having with all this is that I fear that one day she will reverse her decision to read/see everything, and then she'll decide that I've been crossing her line for all this time. The only way for me to know that I'm in safe territory is to show her now, but she doesn't want to see.

When I want to address specifics, she tells me that I'm too OCD and that I'm trying to address every possible scenario, which she says is impossible to predict. She just says, use common sense.

Next morning…

We had a good, long talk. We defined poly for us. She understood. I explained that I want her to always fill 95% of my desires, and that others will likely not fill more than 5%. I explained that her remaining ignorant wasn't helpful to me, that I need her to let me know when her desires aren't being met. I think things are good.

I do develop feelings to some degree for the person I'm sleeping with. I think I am poly by nature. My wife does say, "be loving to me", "be present", "spend time", but she also says, "don't text too much". Those are all pretty vague and she is a pleaser, so she doesn't complain until I've gotten really far off tract. She still has ownership mentality a bit, but that’s rooted in our religious upbringing. I have it too, but I’m trying to let go of it and I think that scares her that I’m willing to let go of ownership of her. I try to be supportive of helping her work out her own issues about this without making her feel like she has a problem that needs to be fixed.

Brittany is coming to visit for 3 days. She’ll be here in two hours. Christy is nervous and is cleaning the house. She is accepting but worried. She isn't upset but is quiet. We've talked it all out before. Right now we're quiet. She says that she's "fine". -- I've told Brittany that we can't have sex in the master bed, but everywhere else is fine. Christy doesn't want to see our PDA.

Later first night.

We're all back at our house now. Brittany is in the shower. Christy is headed to bed. Christy said, "Go have fun." I'm waiting for Brittany to get out of the shower, then we'll play. So far so good. (We all went to dinner and had small talk. Christy and Brittany like each other.)

Next morning

Brittany and I had sex in her bed (guest room), then I went back to Christy in the master bedroom and she asked for sex also. Which I happily accommodated. All seems to be OK. We're all up this morning and going to a park together. Christy says she's fine. She's a bit quiet, but says she's fine.

That afternoon

Brittany and I have had sex twice in the guest room since arriving. Once per day. Christy and I have had sex twice also. Christy SEES that I pick her over Brittany, but Christy still feels irrationally threatened. I think that if she could TALK to Brittany about this fear, that she'd work through it, but Christy won't tackle it head on.

Maybe I'm doing "poly" wrong. I don't understand or like the idea of keeping everyone separate.

Am I supposed to say to my wife, "I'm going out. I'll be back in a day or two." That won't fly with her or me. And we're not publicly out of the closet (yet). So no holding hands in public with another woman. Seems best if everyone knows everyone else and all is on the table, rather than living separate relationships. Or maybe I don't understand what poly is?

I posted a question on an online forum about jealousy in this situation, and someone wrote back, “If what she needs right now is to put her head down and avoid conflict while your girlfriend is here, then let her.”

That's exactly what I've told her. I've told her that if she wants to not talk now, that's completely fine. I've also said that I hope that she'll talk to me about her feelings afterward. I've said that if she's NEVER going to be able to talk about her feelings about this visit, then that's not going to work for me, and then I'll need to give up on polyamory. 

—

The visit concluded well. I had sex with Brittany once each day and kissed her and was affectionate to hr a few times each day. I spent a lot of time with Christy having sex and having our usual marriage intimacy conversations and holding and kissing her. The three of us went out a lot during the visit.

For the final play session, I invited Christy to join me and Brittany. She tried, but she was feeling jealousy, so she calmly pulled back from the situation. I sensed it, and it was fine. Brittany had a good orgasm. I didn’t. Later that night, Christy and I played alone and had a great time.

In all, it was a learning experience, and I think everyone had a good time.

Joe's Weekend at Home - Two Women - Two Nights

Joe time!

Big couple of weeks coming up! This weekend, Brittany is coming for a visit. She’ll be staying a few days. I hope to have sex with her at least once a day while she’s here. Christy and Brittany seem to both get along well and respect each other. Christy still is worried about jealousy, and I do my best to reassure her and make her feel like number-one. Brittany is very sensitive to Christy’s needs and doesn’t want to tread where she’s not invited. I’m super turned on by both of them. We’ll likely have a three-some at some point, but neither of them are super bisexual. Christy is bi-comfortable and is turned on by it, but she’s not super attracted to women naturally as much as she once thought she was. Brittany admits that she is primarily heterosexual also. Those are all good things that favor me getting a lot of action.

Also, Christy has a friend named Darcy. (See Dec 31, 2011 when we first met them). She is now divorced. She’s a bit of a downer in general—especially since her divorce. She had come to visit us about a year ago at an event we were having. She was a bit of a pill to be honest. But she likes sex and craves attention. She texted Christy last night and invited her out to dinner tonight. Christy said that she could come over to have dinner with us and let her know that I’d play with her. (I’ll play with her as long as she’s not a super downer. She’s reasonably fit and energetic and a nice person.) So tonight we’ll have her come for dinner and then I’ll probably have sex with her.

Then next weekend, we’re going to another sex party. More to follow on that!

Joe in MFM Threesome

This is all Joe. The couple we played with last week, Brandy and Justin, I played with them again without Christy last night. She let me go do it. The rule was that I needed to check in with her via text every hour to two. So I did, and I texted her how much I loved her. I met the couple at their hotel room. They showered after traveling. Brandy came out of the shower in a towel.  She dropped the towel. We made out. Her husband came out. We all got naked. Us guys make sure to not bump into each other. We mostly avoided eye contact and tried to not look at each others dicks without making it obvious. We each took turns having sex with Brandy while she took turns giving us blow jobs. It was a standard, fun, traditional threesome. (She let me give her oral sex. She said that she doesn’t like oral sex because she’s too sensitive. She allowed me to go very slowly on her. She came many many times. She told me that I was the best at it. — I actually believe her.) After we all had as many orgasms as we each wanted, we all sat and talked. We talked about this being the first time I’ve done this. We talked about ideas on jealousy and “sperm competition” sexual drive. It was a pretty good experience. We hugged and I went home. Christy was home and I recounted the experience. She wasn’t jealousy at all. She was great. She and I had sex and had a great time.

Solo Play Review - and Our First Full-Swap Couple, Again

We're done.

Done with the experiment. Not the marriage. The marriage is fine. (See how I got you worried? Like a bad movie teaser.) We're OK. On that day, I left him at the hotel room at 10 am. I had told him that I wouldn't text him during the day. I told him that I would like him to come back before falling asleep. I didn't want him sleeping with her. I went to the mall, then a museum, then a park with outdoor art. It started raining, and my mind started worrying and going places. I started to get a bit more jealous that I'd expected. I emailed him at 2 pm that I was back in the hotel room. He didn't reply to my email until 6 pm to tell me this "Saw your email. I worried about you in the rain. She didn't arrive until almost 2 pm. All is well. I love you so incredibly much from the bottom of my heart. You are the most amazing woman in the world. I hope you still love me too."  I was a bit bugged that I'd left the room at 10 am thinking that he was with her immediately after that, but that he was alone in the room for four hours without telling me. My mind continued to go to dark places. At about 7 pm he texted me..

Joe: "How are you? I see that you're still in the hotel room"

Me: "Yes"

Joe: "I'm worried about you."

Me: "Just watching TV. going to sleep."

Joe: "How are you mentally"

Me: "I don't want to talk about it." (He knew I wasn't doing well.)

Joe: "I'm coming back to you very soon". (He later said that this was his way of saying, "I sense a problem so I'm cancelling the rest of the time with Brittany and coming home to save our marriage now.)

Me: "Take your time. I'm fine. Just going to sleep." (I wasn't fine, but he took this as permission to take all the time he wants because i'm going to sleep."

Joe: "I really love you"

At 10:30 pm

Me: "Woke up and see you still aren't here. Trying to go back to sleep. I think our definitions of 'very soon' are different!" (He realized that the experience was over and he hurried back. I’m going to paste in some of what he wrote about the experience.

Joe here. I intentionally didn’t make a lot of plans for that day with Brittany. The more plans we had, the more Christy would want to know and worry about the plans. So no plans = less worry. Once Christy left the hotel room, I called Brittany and said said that she’d be a bit late coming by. (Late turned into almost four hours). She got a hotel room at another hotel. She picked me up in her car. We kissed in the car and she drove us to her hotel. We didn’t get into the room until almost 4 pm. We made out and got hot and heavy, but we put off sex until after we got lunch. She hadn’t eaten. We went down to the hotel bar and got some food and talked for a while. She knew that I’d NEVER done anything like this, and I expressed my anxiety for myself and for my wife. Brittany knows my wife pretty well and very much respects her. She genuinely doesn’t want to hurt our marriage. She said that she is genuinely attracted to me. That was VERY flattering. I’ve never had ANYONE other than my wife express attraction to me in that way. I do not consider myself good looking. We went back up to the room and had sex. It was good and fun. We sat and talked (naked) and had sex again. (I was able to get a second erections, but couldn’t orgasm a second time.) I saw the email from Christy and responded. We then went down to dinner. Dinner took a while— kitchen problems. We walked around the hotel and talked about her life and her boyfriend. (He knows that she and I were meeting. Their relationship was/is strained.) I then texted Christy the 7 pm texts. Brittany and I went back to the hotel room and played again. We used condoms. (He boyfriend has problems with erectile dysfunction. He’s come out as bisexual, and she thinks he may be gay. So the sex with him isn’t as passionate she says. — My wife and I know him. Christy has played with him and can vouch that this is all correct.) Brittany had texted me weeks before about a fantasy she has about me having sex with her and then pulling out and cuming on her chest. So I did. Yes, it was super hot! She is extremely into sex and has a massive libido. I then got the text from Christy at 10:30 and hustled back to our hotel room.

Back in our room, Christy was in the bed in the dark. I slipped in and slipped into bed next to her, gave her a hug and said, “I love you.” She responded with “OK” and not hugging me back. I realized that she was not doing well. She did not want to talk. I took two Benadryl and went to bed. She sent me a long text at midnight that I didn’t see until morning. I’ll just paraphrase it: “I’m not processing this well. I keep imaging what you and she did all day and I worry that you did things that triggered my jealousy. I also feel bad that we didn’t communicate more about the day. I’m glad you did this, but I wish I’d been kept more in the loop and checked in with me.”

Christy here again. That’s all accurate. I was hoping that he’s involve me more in the updates and tell me what was going on. We failed to be that specific in advance. The following day I was a bit quiet. Joe and I did go out and go shopping. Oh, we tried to have sex first that morning. It was “apology sex” on his part. I wasn’t super into it, but I let him do it. He was having a hard time orgasming and then he starting crying during sex because he felt so bad that he couldn’t orgasm with me that morning. He said he felt like he HAD to orgasm to show me that he loved me and that if he didn’t that I’d end our marriage. He was being silly. He put himself under so much pressure that he couldn’t climax. It was fine. We went out shopping and walked around the town. It took all day, but we got back to normal. We talked A LOT about the experience. He was sensitive to not tell me all the hot details. He put my mind at ease. Brittany texted me to see how I was. I convinced her that I was fine after Joe had texted her that I wasn’t doing as well as I thought I would do. By that evening, I really was fine and we both texted Brittany to let her know that all was well. We had planned on going out with her that evening together, but Joe and I decided that we’d just spend the evening with just the two of us. He proved to me that he really does love me and puts me first. Technically he followed the rules that we’d agreed upon. After the experience I discovered that I did need more involvement and that 12 hours was too much for me. It gave my mind too much time to worry. I’m up to doing it again, but let’s start with 2-4 hours next time or have him check in with me every few hours to update me on things.

——

One week later. Look at this post on our blog from 2011. This was the first couple we’d ever had a full-swap with: Brandy and Justin. In the six years since then, they’d joined the military and had a second child. They’d moved a few times with the military, then they got out and are back here. They messaged us asking if we wanted to meet. They kindly said that he were their favorite sex parters. They convinced us that they thought it was true. They were very young the first time 20/21 years old. (Too young for us in retrospect.) We met them for dinner on July 28, 2017. When we saw them in person, they have aged VERY well. Two VERY hot people. (I must say that we have aged well too.) We talked about what we’ve all been doing for the past six years and where life has taken us. He’s a very nice shy, gentle guy. She’s outgoing and smoking sexy! She’s had a very boyfriends over the years and has played solo. After dinner, we went to the hotel room that we’d arranged for. We sat and talked for a while longer—always allowing for the women to take the lead. Men know that they are to not be pushy. That can be frustrating to the women but it balances the risk of being assaulted. At a long pause in the conversation, then a sexy glance, the women quickly jumped on the opposite men. Brandy with Joe and me with Justin. We each took a different bed. The sex was hot and the positions exciting. The passion was perfect. Everybody orgasmed—the women multiple times. It was exactly the kind of experience that swingers desire—in every way. Pure perfection. We all really like each other. — Challenges: we live 70 miles from each other, so frequent outings are a challenge. There is a significant age difference, and they have very little money, so we need to pay every time. None of this is a huge problem, but it doesn’t lend itself to the easiest of maintaining a perfect friendship. 

The next morning (yesterday), they texted and asked if they could meet us again next weekend.Two weekends in a row with the same couple is usually a bit much for us, and I do have other commitments with relatives next weekend. Joe told them that we couldn’t next weekend because I was busy. They then wrote back and asked if Joe could play with them in a MFM threesome. I actually told him that I was fine with that. Joe was surprised that I let him — especially after last weekend. He’s nervous to have the husband there. Joe has no same-sex attraction. He’s not phobic, but it doesn’t appeal to him, and he’s worried about performance why being watched by Justin. But they’re all going to do it. We’ll see how it goes.

######

In full discloser, there’s one thing we should add about the experience with Brandy and Justin. Look back at our post in 2011. We didn’t use condoms with them in 2011, nor with the couple immediately after that in 2011. Since then, we never played again  without condoms—until this past Friday night. Brandy and Justin both pushed on without condoms and we (Joe and I) both let it happen. Just before Joe came (he told me the next day), he leaned in and asked her “how do you avoid pregnancy?” Given that he was just about to climax, he was proud of himself for having the minimal presence of mind to at least have a coherent sentence. Brandy replied, “I’m fixed. We both are.” Then Joe came in her. My experience with Justin was similar. I was so overcome with orgasms that I didn’t even notice or care that he didn’t have a condom on. It just felt SOOO good. And he came in me. (I’m fixed too. Hysterectomy.) We actually do believe them that they are sterile. — Both Joe and I avoided talking about it until at dinner last night when he brought it up. We both shrugged. We know that it wasn’t right. We know that we need to get tested again for STDs. We know that we shouldn’t do it again without condoms. — I also know that this is what most readers are going to harp on us about when reading this post. - We just looked it up. To cover most of the STD’s we will wait 4 weeks to get tested, unless we have symptoms sooner. By 4 weeks, the incubation period will have past, so either we’ll test positive, or we’ll likely be in the clear. 

Solo for Joe

Yes, I'm back after a long time away. Life is good. Marriage is great. We haven't had sex with other people for many months. We've been on two first-time dates with other couples since then, but no spark. We had a date planned tonight with what seems like a great couple, but they just told us they have a family emergency. I 70% believe them. We'll see if we get another chance to go out with them.

The other BIG news is that we're taking a trip to visit a woman who we know. We played with her (Brittany) and her BF (Daniel) at a party at the Bellagio in January and back in the fall. (Brittany and Daniel don't live in the same city.) We're flying out to meet Brittany in her hometown, and I'm going to let my husband have a full day and night ALONE with Brittany! This is huge for us! I'm letting my husband go on an 18-hour date alone with another women while I go to museums and shopping on my own. I'm processing all of this as best I can. I'm working on feeling a ton of compersion.

Trapeze

We went to the best sex club ever last night! It was a Trapeze club in an east coast city. (Visiting for an in-law’s wedding, but snuck out to play.)

We had tried to arrange a meet-up with a couple, but it didn’t work out, so we went to the club to see it.

They had at least three different bars inside. It’s BYOB, but you check your alcohol in with the staff and they pour the drinks for you at no cost.

They also have a buffet. Normally I’d never eat from a buffet in a place associated with sex, including strip clubs, but this buffet was great and clean and well maintained. At about 1 am it turns into a breakfast buffet.

Like most sex clubs, it was dark and loud, but the layout was nice in that it wasn’t too much of a maze and it wasn’t too wide-open—the perfect balance of each. The dance floor was nice, seating area and tables for smoking and non-smoking, lots of cozy corners for chatting and sitting.

In the back was the locker-room. If you wanted to go to the play areas, you had to be dressed in only a towel or in lingerie for the women. We stripped down and put on our towels. The locker room attendees were high-class concierge gentlemen who reminded me of maitre d’s in a four-star hotel. High-class all the way. 

After entering the play zone and seeing everyone else in towels, we approached a staff member and asked for an orientation to the various rooms. He walked us around and explained how the rooms were set up: windows between rooms, couples only area, pool table, restrooms, etc. He gave us condoms when Joe asked, since Joe left his in the locker because had no pockets once in his towel. The play zone was a nice maze of rooms big and small. The large play room had about 20 vinyl “beds” with sheer curtains between some of them. There were about 50 people in the room all either naked or in towels and all in some phase of sex with someone. We found one of the remaining open spots and went at it with each other. (I don’t need to explain to you the details of sex; you should know how that works.)

After we were done, we vacated our spot so someone else could move in. We found a Diamond VIP section that is accessible only to club members who pay for that level. It’s another set of play rooms that look even more posh and has its own dance floor and bar. We were just allowed to peek through the window to their foyer. We were curious to know how much better that area was, but since we’re just visiting for the day and because we’d already had sex, we decided to not pay for the upgrade.

We then had breakfast at the buffet and left.

It was a great club. If you ever get the change to visit a Trapeze, do it! We wish we could open one in Salt Lake. It would be awesome if the town folks didn’t shut it down.

The White Party at the Bellagio

We went to Las Vegas for the AVN (Adult Video News) weekend. Also known as the Porn Oscars. We went to just one party: “The White Party” at the Bellagio — not the official AVN White Party. The official parties just have porn stars in them, but no one really having sex. This was the wilder party.

We wore white, just as did everyone else. On our way out of our hotel room, I made some comment about how these could be temple clothes - NOT!

We met the rest of the guests at the Lilly Lounge in the hotel casino. SO many hot people!!

At 11 pm, we were all lead up to a hospitality suite. There were about 100 people. Half of the women could have been porn stars. They had no problem being in lingerie and showing off their nipples. Porn was playing on all four TV’s in the suite. There was a pool table, a bar with two beautiful women working as bartenders, house music, and club lighting. Not too shabby a set-up.

We came to the party with some friends that we’d made at a previous party. (See our entry from Dec 11, 2016). We met up with Daniel and Brittany at the party. We had been flirting with them via text for days prior, so it was a sure thing that we’d have sex with them at the party. After scoping out all the rooms, the four of us made our way to a large L-shaped couch in the back bedroom. We could easily see out into the main room and watch people come and go into the bedrooms. People were welcome to use the bed in this bedroom, since all we needed was the couch.

Brittany was all over Joe. They really started going at it without any hesitation. Daniel and I moved a little slower. He pushed me back against the couch and hiked up my skirt. Of course, I didn’t have panties on (neither did Brittany). Once he was hard, he put on a condom and pushed inside me. I came in less than a minute. I turned around on the couch and faced out the window toward the strip. He repeatedly fucked me from behind. He smacked my ass over and over as he did. I came and came and came. I was really hoping he would soon. I looked over at Joe and Brittany. Just like last time, they were flipping into every position possible and doing it from all angles and then taking turns going down on each other. She likes to moan and call out his name during sex. She pants and huffs during sex. She’s not acting or faking. She was really into it, and she nods her head saying, “oh yeah, yeah, yeah.” She’s so hot to watch! She came more than a few times also. Then he came in her. (With a condom.) He went to the restroom, past the two other naked couples on the bed, to discard his condom. He remained hard even after cumming. Within minutes, he had another condom back on and was letting her ride him. He didn’t come again, but she sure did.

After a couple more minutes, he said that he needed some water. Joe wasn’t looking perfect. I could tell that he wasn’t feeling well. He said that he was having reflux and he was worried about puking if they continued. He wasn’t super sick, but it was apparent that we were all done playing. I was fine with that because I was getting a sore ass. We all got dressed and walked out together. We walked down the lobby, said goodnight to each other and went our separate ways.

We chatted via text the next day, but we were more in the mood to just have time to ourselves, so we were bums and just kept to ourselves for the rest of the weekend.

We had a good time with them, but I don’t know for sure that we’ll see them again, even though Brittany sure does want to see Joe again.  (Sad to say that I wasn’t super into Daniel. Nice guy but not really my type. I think that Joe and Brittany were a much better match, and Brittany knows that. I even felt a bit jealous seeing how much she wanted my husband.)